"Did they do that when they took you down from the cross?"

So last year at Easter our church had a drama and I was asked to play the role of Jesus.  "Uh, yeah.......sure..."  Im not sure if I was allowed to turn down the role, I mean, surely that has to be some kind of sin.  So I said yes and went along with it.  To make the play "real" looking, they commissioned my brother to be the guard that drags Jesus to the cross and nails him to it.  Real funny guys.   I stood backstage as they poured fake blood all over my shirtless torso and arms and painted bruises all over me.  My intro was from the back.....on all fours, with a rope tied around my neck..........Zack was at the other side of the rope, dragging me to the cross.  He played his role VERY well.  It was very realistic and I can understand why the little blonde boy watching thought I was actually nailed to the cross.  As my brother and the other guard kicked and shoved and dragged me to the cross I had an experience that I believe one can only experience in a situation similar to that one, thats a story for another day.  Anyways, up on the cross I went, the nails were hammered in, I hung, and breathed the last breath, only later to make another appearance in white. End of story, yadda yadda yadda.

For months after this, the little blonde boy was deathly afraid of me.  I would see him come running through church, catch a glimpse of me, stop, and turn the other way and take off.  I learned from his mother that he actually believed I was nailed to the cross, and burned in anger towards the ones who put me there. hehe.  I found it a little humorous at first.  When he was in his mother's arms he would talk, mostly ask questions, "Did it hurt when they put you up there?" "Why did they do that?"  His questions were so innocent, and I took the moment as an opportunity to say things about how I did it to pay for your sins and other cheesy Christian phrases, hoping to sear them into his mind, JESUS DIED FOR ME......JESUS PAID FOR MY SINS......JESUS LOVES ME THAT MUCH....... I hoped that would forever be on his mind, but it began to look like it wasn't.......it was ME he saw up there, not Jesus.  And thats how he understood it.  After a while I showed him my hands and tried to explain to him that it wasn't real, that I wasn't hurt and I was just an actor.  He couldn't wrap his mind around it.  The months ticked by, I left for Budapest and came back 6 months later and there he was.  I began to work with his father and would see him from time to time.  Trying to overcome his fear of me, I began to hold my hand out whenever I saw him, offering a high-five.  The first few times he shied away timidly but eventually he grew accustomed to it.  We high-fived.  Finally, after a year of him fearing me, he had finally grown out of his belief that I was a supernatural being who had been hung on the cross and lived to tell about it.  Whenever I would show up to his house to head to work with his father I would see his blonde head pop up in the window looking out over the trucks, waving goodbye.  When we returned from work he would be outside, and this is where our conversations began.   

One day I was talking with his father on the way to work and he told me that his son likes to play "work", and he always asks to be me....... Something churned inside me, I knew there was more to the story and that I would return to this conversation many times to look it over.   "He always wants to be Nyk" "Dad, can I be Nyk?"........ The whole situation seem unbelievable to me.  I had no idea he thought so highly of me, I thought he was deathly afraid of me.....  I would catch him after work in the driveway and he would come talk to me.  He would tell me ALL about him and what he can do.  "I learned how to do this....." and then he would take me into the garage and show me his new skill.  "You want to see?" was always his question.  "You want to see?"........."Of course" I'd reply.  

Just the other day I was speaking with his father in the driveway when he came walking out of the garage.  His father was saying something about how the boy talks about me or tries to act like me or something like that, I can't remember, but I decided to pay special attention to him for a while to see if there was more to this than I was noticing.  The boy started talking to me, telling me about something new of his and he wanted to show me.  I sat on the ground to pet their new puppy, the boy sat there watching.  I put my keys on the ground to play with the puppy.  He said, "You got keys?  I got keys, inside, can I get em, you wanna see my keys? I got keys too."  I was floored..... this kid wants me to see everything about him that resembles................me....  After dashing inside and returning he sat on the ground and just watched me.....  After a couple minutes of me toying around with the puppy, his hand reached up to my face to touch the bar I have through my eyebrow.  "He just touched my....face" I thought.  I look curiously at him and he asked, "Whats that?"  

"Thats an eyebrow ring"  

"How did they do that?" 

 "Well....uh.....then pinched my eyebrow and then stuck a needle through it then put this bar in it."  

"Did it hurt?"

"A little"

"Did they do that when they took you down from the cross?"

Something caught in my throat........this kid still thought that was real..... It wasn't something that he thought of occasionally, it was something that was always on his mind when I was around.  He was cross-focused.  The cross was central to his relationship with me, and everything he did and said to me he did with awe.  There is something about this that wont leave me alone, something about the Kingdom is reflected in this situation that is so true, so real, and I love it.  The story still continues, I still see this boy, and I'm sure I'll have more stories.....

"Did they do that when they took you down from the cross?"